


If It Wasn't For Bad Luck

by Wand_of_Thunder



Category: Captain America - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Drinking, F/M, Humidity, I dont ignore cannon per se, I just choose not to comply, I wrote this during a hurricane, Jane and Darcy being badasses, Road trip gone wrong, Storms, adults playing truth or dare, hunkering down, hydra being dumb, like losers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-27
Updated: 2018-05-15
Packaged: 2019-03-24 18:12:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,935
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13816683
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wand_of_Thunder/pseuds/Wand_of_Thunder
Summary: Why the hell do they even bother trying to take a vacation?Or Darcy supposes there are worst places to ride out a storm than a safe house with her boss and two super soldiers.





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> Goodness, I was gone for a long while there. Sorry about that.

In hindsight, Darcy should have known trouble was hot on their heels, dogging them like the mosquitoes no amount of bug spray could come close to touching on their foray into the Deep South. Things were going too smoothly; they were having too much _fun._

And, well, she was following _Jane_ afterall. As much as she loved her intrepid leader and would walk through hellfire for her in a heartbeat, there was no denying that where Dr. Foster went trouble was never far behind. Like Newton’s law of universal gravitation, it was to be viewed as a scientific certainty.

However, the whole ordeal had started out innocently enough. Jane had received yet another invite to yet another conference to give yet another keynote address. It normally would have been thrown out with the other 95% of similar invitations that Darcy fielded for her boss ever since the Convergence and subsequent Nobel Prize. But those clever, _clever_ devils that organized this particular astronautics and astronomy conference had printed their offer on a beautiful, high-gloss brochure that featured a swanky beachfront resort and spa. And Darcy hadn’t had an actual vacation in what felt like an eternity. It took some begging, a bit of pleading, and a dash of mild blackmail, but she was able to convince her unrepentant workaholic of a best friend/boss to accept the gig, along with a sizable paycheck and a week long vacation for what amounted to a few hours of work.

So, the merry duo packed some bags and hopped a flight to sunny Naples, Florida for some relaxation, sunshine, and a little science. Jane met her obligations rather quickly, she already had a speech written for such events and schmoozing “important” (read:rich) industry professionals and bandwagon-jumping, veteran scientists was old hat, so by the third day of the conference Jane and Darcy were able to plant themselves on the beach with an over-sized umbrella, some trashy novels, a bucket of sunscreen, and absolutely zero fucks.

It was _amazing._

Even Jane had managed to sit still long enough to loosen up and enjoy the quiet serenity of the resort’s private beach, and the hypnotizing effects of the Gulf of Mexico. And even knock back a few complimentary watermelon margaritas. Because, while she still preferred working, it was clear that the two of them needed something like this. They were young, able-bodied women that had spent the better part of the last 5 or more years either indoors stuck in a lab, or out in the dark, chasing stars long after the sun had gone down, with no breaks in between. So, yeah, Jane could admit that the TLC and the vitamin D were long overdue.

But, old habits died hard, and after a dip in the pleasantly cool gulf followed by a little harmless flirting with the group of tanned, glistening shirtless men that were playing beach volleyball nearby, Darcy had returned to the shade of their umbrella only to find Jane squinting down at one of her handmade cosmic-energy-meter-thingamajigs(™), trying futility to block the sun’s glare off the screen.

Darcy just sighed and flopped down on the blanket next to her friend, grabbing the sunscreen from their tote bag and reapplying it to her overly hot skin. She was going to have a burn, but a serious case of vacation brain made it hard to care much.

“I was thinking Italian food for dinner. Or dessert, really. I want to eat my weight in tiramisu… Jane?” Darcy turned and poked the other women in the ribs. It was like hitting a reset button.

“Hmm? Oh, yeah - uh food for dinner sounds good,” Jane answered distractedly right before the device in hands let out a truly horrible screech. They both flinched. Two old women walking by with giant floppy hats stopped to give them the stink eye.

“You forgot to charge it again, didn’t you?” Darcy accused before offering the old birds an apologetic smile. They just huffed and continued their power walk down the beach. “That is so going to be us one day, BTW.”

“I call the leopard print bikini,” Jane said, pausing to slap the meter hard against her thigh a few times. The stupid little machine just kept on screeching. “And, no I did not forget to charge it! The battery is full- what the hell?” As she spoke, the damned thing suddenly stopped, emitted a series of gradually weakening little beeps, and promptly died.

“Huh…”

“Just a fluke?” Darcy asked, fingers firmly crossed.

“Maybe. _Probably_.” Jane replied, her mind clearly far off in science la-la-land. She pursed her lips and chewed thoughtfully on the inside of her cheek in that way that meant she was too far gone for Darcy to save. She’d lost her friend to the call of science one again.

“You want to go back to the hotel room and check the other machines, don’t you?”

“Yes, please."

* * *

 It wasn’t a fluke.

It was _never_ a fluke. Not when you’d hitched your wagon to someone like the incomparable Lady Jane Foster, the fiercest and tiniest scientific pioneer in all the nine realms. Every single one of the instruments that Jane had packed, even the poor little phase meter that hadn’t been the same since a dark elf fell on it, had picked up similar, weird signals. And one of them had managed to plot a rough map that would, in theory, lead them to the source of the disturbance. When she saw that, Jane got that manic glint in her eye that made Darcy simultaneously excited and terrified.

_Cue the road trip montage._

They packed up, _again_ , checked out of their hotel, rented a truck and set out to chase down their mysterious lead. And while, yeah the beach was nice and she missed the hotel room’s jacuzzi bathtub, Darcy couldn’t keep the stupid grin off her face.

This new little side trip brought back all the best bits of their early years together. The close quarters, circuitous driving, pre-packaged junk food, and heart-racing sense of adventure. It was nostalgic as hell. Plus, these days Jane let her play some tunes as they hunted, and they trusted each other implicitly, in a solid way that could only come out of years of trudging through life together. So, the rich resort people and tourists back in Naples could all hang as far as Darcy was concerned.

This was where she belonged; in the driver’s seat, the AC blowing at her hair, B.B. King and his Lucille playing the blues from the radio, and Jane navigating like a modern day Ponce de Leon with severe attention deficit disorder beside her.  

“Right up ahead- No, wait! Left, _left_ ,” Jane exclaimed, her face practically glued to the beeping, flashing instrument on her lap.

The cab of the rented pickup truck rocked alarmingly as Darcy threw the wheel to the left at the last possible second. A cloud of dirt kicked up around them as they left the paved highway for a sketchy backwoods dirt road, a stretch of land she doubted even Google Maps would dare to survey, but seeing no signs warning “private property” or “no trespassing” she kept on driving. The weathered potholes and uneven terrain forced her to ease up on the gas, slowing to a crawl as she waited for Jane's next frantic shout of direction.

After a while, Darcy glanced briefly in the rear view mirror, expecting to see more of what was ahead, bowing oaks dripping with moss, palm fronds reaching for clear blue sky, and an isolated, empty road. She nearly gave herself whiplash from the double take from what she actually saw. A large, military looking, unmarked vehicle with a cracked windshield,  barreling towards them like a huge, black behemoth.

“Uh, Jane? Please tell me that’s a SHIELD car coming up behind us,” she asks, her foot reflexively stepping harder on the gas. The truck lurched forward, bouncing uncomfortably along the uneven surface of the road.

Jane looked up from the device on her lap for the first time in an hour and twisted around to peer out the rear window. She narrowed her eyes, anger bubbling up. _What’s a lady got to do to make a ground-breaking discovery in peace for once?_ “They don’t look like SHIELD…”

“Well, whoever the fuck they are, they're not slowing down! What do I do?”

“Shit, do you remember where I put the panic button?” Jane patted her pockets only to find a jolly rancher and the pen she lifted from the hotel check-out desk. Darcy turned to gap at her, the truck veering off road a bit as she switched her attention to yelling at her boss.

“No! It's supposed to be on your person, Jane! What good is a panic button if you can't find it while you're panicking?” she squawked, now practically standing on the gas pedal in a desperate attempt to gain some distance on their pursuer. It was a losing battle, they clearly were out horse-powered, but she had to try.

“Stop panicking! I think it's in my duffle,” Jane yelled, unbuckling her seat belt and crawling into the cramped backseat. Her hands shook as she ripped open the zipper on her bag and riffled through her unfolded clothes, nearly upending the whole thing in her search. Luckily, it didn’t take long to find the little credit card sized transmitter that Maria Hill had given her after the whole Greenwich disaster. She pressed her thumb to the print-scanner in the center, holding down until the green light blinked red, and shoved it down the pocket of her jean shorts.

“Grab my taser while you’re at it,” Darcy called behind her. Jane quickly found the hard plastic case and hauled it and herself over the console and back into the passenger seat.

“Okay, panic button is pressed and help should be on its way. We’re fine, we’re going to be fine,” Jane breathed out. “Just keep driving, stay in the truck, everything will be fine.”

But because the Universe was a giant troll and loved to be a contradictory little _shit -_ just as soon as the words left Jane’s lips, their truck was violently rear-ended and forced into a swampy drainage ditch.

“You just had to say it, didn’t you? _Oww_...”

* * *

As the caravan of local police vans and cruisers, and unmarked SHIELD vehicles started off down the highway, Steve found himself grinning like a possum eating a sweet potato, to borrow a local turn of phrase.

There were few things left in the world that brought Steve Rogers such unadulterated joy as catching, beating up, and arresting hapless Hydra agents. With each base he exploded or hive he brought down, every agent he threw behind bars, a little more peace settled deep in his marrow. It just felt _good,_ watching justice prevail in a time muddled with way too many shades of grey.

“ _Jesus Christ_ , it’s hotter than the devil’s balls out here. Can we hurry up and go already?”

And having his old friend standing beside him again, burning with his own personal passion to see Hydra decimated, was just icing on the cake- even if he was a cranky, blasphemous sonuvabitch.

“Yeah, alright,” Steve replied with a casual shrug, still smiling widely. “But I’m driving.” He snatched the keys dangling from Bucky’s hand and sprinted to the SUV before the other man even had a chance to react.

Steve settled himself in behind the wheel, started the car and blasted the AC as high as it could go. While he was still buzzing contentedly from a job well done, he had to admit that Bucky had a fair point. The heat was brutal, and coupled with the stifling humidity, Florida’s climate in the summer was pretty unforgiving.

“How do people live down here?” Bucky grumbled as he opened the passenger door and climbed in. He sighed loudly as the cold breeze from the car’s vents hit his sweat soaked skin.

“I think you just answered your own quest-” Steve was cut off by the loud pinging of the comms unit in his ear. Judging by his wince, it was clear that Bucky was getting the same message.

 _“Rogers, Barnes are you two receiving?”_ The two men shared a look of surprise, clearly not expecting that particular voice to appear over their secure channel.

“Yeah, Natasha. Go ahead,” Steve responded, bracing himself for the worst. A personal request from the Black Widow had the tendency to end rather painfully for him. The last time she asked for help landed him in the infirmary for a good week with a grand total of 17 broken bones (a personal record). His left tibia still ached when it got cold out.

_“A distress beacon’s been activated by a high-level noncombatant not far from your location. We gotta get someone out there to diffuse the situation ASAP before other interested parties catch wind and it all goes to hell.”_

“Other interested parties meaning Hydra?” Bucky asked, frowning. He switched on the touch screen embedded into the SUV’s dashboard and located the new mission file Natasha must have sent. A picture of two young women popped up, both wearing plastic-looking, horned helmets and smiling prettily for the camera. They were standing arm-in-arm in front of what looked like a replica of an old viking ship. A snort of laughter escaped him, unbidden. Steve gave him a shove.

_“Worse, Asgardians. The beacon activated is assigned to Dr. Jane Foster, Thor’s human girlfriend. He trusted us with protecting her and her assistant while he’s off world. If something happens under our watch then-”_

“We lose Thor’s trust,” Steve finished. Already, Thor wasn’t the biggest fan of some of his fellow Avengers. Neither of them wanted to think about what he’d do if he found them negligent in safeguarding the woman he loved.

_“And put Earth’s alliance with Asgard in jeopardy.”_

“Got it, what’s the location?”

_“An unpaved, county road nearby. I’m sending the coordinates to your GPS units now. It’s about half an hour away, less if you let Barnes drive.”_

Bucky smirked smugly at that. Steve ignored him. “Half an hour? I don’t like it, Nat. You think she’ll be okay for that long?”

Natasha laughed, a frightening sound even over the scratch and static of their coms. “ _You’ve never met Dr. Foster, have you?”_


	2. Two

On a scale that peaked with a giant, metal Asgardian Destroyer that shot magical lasers, the two Hydra goons that attacked Jane and Darcy barely even registered at dark-elf-pawn-with-bad-aim levels of difficulty.

Granted, one of the two was clearly just a terrified tech holding a firearm for the first time, trying not to either throw up or shoot himself. The other, bigger one was probably rather formidable say a few hours ago, but now looked alarmingly like he had recently been mauled by a bear. A large gash, still sluggishly bleeding, marred his left bicep and the hand on that arm was very obviously broken. There was also what looked to be a bullet lodged in the forehead of the stupid skull-octopus emblazoned on his tactical vest.

Something, or someone, had gotten to them first.

But, as worrying as that was, the girls didn’t have time to dwell on the condition of their attackers; injured or hale - Hydra was a serious threat.

Darcy was the first out of the now lopsided truck, her flip-flopped feet squelching sickeningly in the soggy earth, her taser charged and tucked safely behind her in the waistband of her shorts. She paused to pull down the neckline of her top, making sure her cleavage was distractingly visible, before waving and calling out to the smashed SUV.

“Oh gosh, are you guys alright?”

The battered men approached her, clearly taken aback by the calculated look of feminine dismay on her face, and her general lack of terror. Darcy could see the hesitation on their faces and hoped their injuries included head trauma. She wasn’t sure how obtuse she could act without giving herself away.

“What are the chances of running into someone on a road like this, huh?” she mused, making a show to “absentmindedly” flip her ponytail.

The tech relaxed some, sagging visibly as he seemed to register the lone, seemingly unarmed young woman as a non-threat. His hand, which was obviously clutching a gun hidden poorly under his lab coat, fell empty by his side.

“Yeah, lucky us,” growled the other, muscular one, eyeing her warily. He shot a glance at their ruined, rented truck. Darcy tensed, held her breath and prayed for Jane to stay hidden - until the man holstered his weapon with a pained sigh. “Now look lady, here’s how this is gonna-”

“Oh wait, who’s that? Friends of yours?” Darcy lifted her hand and pointed down the road towards where they came, bouncing on her heels in faux-excitement. “Maybe they can help!”

Both men spun around, foolishly turning their backs to _harmless little_ Darcy. She almost felt bad for what happened next.

_Well, not really..._

As soon as his attention was off her, Darcy lunged at the big one and jammed the prongs of her taser into the thick muscle of his neck. He yelped as her weapon discharged and grabbed her wrist as he seized, squeezing painfully. Darcy grit her teeth and held on until the large man dropped to the road, twitching and drooling at her feet. She swore as she pried his stiff fingers off her wrist. It was already tender and red.

At the same time, Jane leapt from behind the truck and bashed the remaining, startled guy over the head with what looked like a tire iron. He went down hard with a sickening crack and joined his comrade in the dirt.

There was a stunned silence, for a moment the droning buzz of cicadas and the rustle of the wind blowing through the trees seemed deafening.

Darcy let out a hysterical little laugh. Adrenaline and fear pumped steadily through her veins, mixing with the excitement from earlier to create powerful cocktail that made her heart pound heavily in her chest. She felt like she could climb a mountain or wrestle an alligator with her bare hands.

“Holy hell, Jane!” She moved to the second guy and gingerly rolled him over with her foot. It didn’t look pretty. But at least it was unlikely that either of them would be assaulting her or her boss any time soon.

“Did I- is he _dead_?” Jane whispered, finally dropping her tire iron. She looked ready to throw up. Darcy shrugged and bent over to press her hand to the chest of Jane’s victim.

“Nah, he’s still breathing. I can’t believe that actually worked!”

Together they found some bungee cords in the back of the truck and managed to secure their failed assailants tightly to one another. By the time they were done, the sun was high in sky and beating down on them with a vengeance. Most of the adrenaline was wearing off too, and it became obvious that they hadn’t managed to escape the ordeal unscathed.

The initial impact and crashing into the ditch had banged them up more than they realized. Jane had hit the dashboard pretty hard upon impact since she hadn’t had a chance to rebuckle her seatbelt, and was sporting a rather large goose-egg on her forehead along with some possibly cracked ribs. Darcy was luckier, her only injuries being the sash of bruises blooming across her shoulder and collarbone caused by the seatbelt strap restraining her body from mashing into the steering column, and a hopefully-just-sprained given to her by the big idiot as he went down.

The truck itself fared the worst. It’s back bumper was gone, now stuck in the grill of the massive car that rammed it, and thick, black smoke was streaming out from under its hood. All that on top of the fact that it was currently at a 45 degree angle, in a swampy drainage ditch, on the side of a dirt road, in the middle of Bumfuck, Florida… yeah, the rental company was going to have some questions.

_Thank God they sprung for the insurance..._

Alarmed equally by the smoke and Jane’s injuries, Darcy led Jane away and over to rest in the shade provided by a cluster of palm trees at the opposite side of the road. She briefly entertained the idea of commandeering the Hydra-mobile, decided not to risk it. The last thing they needed was to have some experimental tech blow up in their faces or to be mistaken for members of a terrorist cell.

So, she made her weakly protesting boss as comfortable as possible in the grass, and went back and gathered their bags and Jane’s instruments from the truck, getting even sweatier and more gross in the process. She piled it all next to Jane so she could rest against something a bit more comfortable than the spiky trunk of a dirty palm tree.

Miraculously, they had had the foresight to buy a case of bottled water before they left civilization. Darcy handed a bottle off to Jane before draining one herself. It was warm, but it beat the hell out of dehydration.

When the truck was finally cleared, Darcy flopped herself down into the grass nearby and let out a tremendous sigh. _SHIELD better hurry their happy asses up_ she thought miserably, feeling the last of the adrenaline boost burn away. Her body hurt, it was two billion degrees outside, and she was royally pissed off. Not to mention worried about her friend.

“How ya doing Janey?” she asked, turning to check on the quietly suffering woman.

“I’ve had worse,” Jane replied with a grimace. Her hand shot up to soothe her the throbbing in her head, but only succeeded in painfully jarring her damaged ribs. Her arms flopped, defeated to her side with a little whimper. “I really fucking hate Hydra…”

“Try not move too much,” Darcy supplied lamely. She wracked her brain for any scrap of information she’d retained about head injuries.

1\. Don’t let them fall asleep.

2\. Monitor them for changes in cognitive function.

3\. Move them to a dark, quiet room…

Darcy suddenly remembered the sunglasses still perched on the top of her head, took them off, and put them on Jane’s face. “Here and I’m sure I have some ibuprofen or something in my purse. Hold on.”

She didn’t have ibuprofen, but there was a bottle of caffeine-free Midol which at the very least wouldn’t hurt and would maybe even put a tiny dent in the pain. Jane swallowed the pills down with swig of water, and thanked Darcy quietly.

“How did they even know we were out here, or who we were for that matter?” Darcy wondered aloud. “For fuck’s sake, _I_ don’t even know where we are!”

“Coincidence?” Jane shrugged, then gasped at the jolt of pain it caused. She steeled herself and tried again. “They didn’t recognize you, so it’s doubtful they were sent for us... Hydra must have picked up on the anomaly somehow too. But how?”

That was the thing that bothered Jane the most. How in the hell did Hydra and their crackpot scientists get there _first_ ? It was a matter of professional pride. She had a goddamn _Nobel Prize_ hanging up in her office at home. Her research and tech wasn’t just unique; it was irreplicable, running partly on data that she collected from other realms. A steadily dwindling gang of terrorists and unethical, pariah scientists shouldn’t be beating her in her own field.

“Well, whatever reason I hope more of them aren’t on their way. My taser is out of juice. ” Darcy shielded her eyes and peered down the barren road.

There wasn’t any sign of activity in either direction.

Across the road, the rental truck’s engine caught fire.

“Fuck it, if someone doesn’t show up soon, I’m calling an uber!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gah, thank you all for the warm welcome back!
> 
> And thanks for reading <3
> 
> I'm trying to get chapters out as fast as I can edit them, so please bear with me...


	3. Three

When it was all said and done, Darcy and Jane spent a grand total of thirty-eight minutes stranded on the side of the road, including the time it took to subdue and hogtie their new Hydra friends. But sitting injured and cranky in the sweltering heat being eaten alive by mosquitos and a whole host of other creepy crawlies, sweating their asses off in the humidity - it felt more like _days._

Darcy almost wept when she caught the first glimpse of a vehicle coming down the shitty, backwoods road. She stood up to flag them down.

“Please don’t be Hydra, please don’t be Hydra,” she muttered under her breath, fingers crossed, as the car came to a dramatic stop a few feet away, kicking up a cloud of dirt.

The sight of the bulky man that hopped out of the passenger side made her jaw drop open.

_No. Fucking. Way._

“Ms. Lewis? We received Dr. Foster’s distress call. Are either of you injured?”

Yes, fucking way.

There was no mistaking that strong jaw, those baby-blues, the ridiculously impressive span of his shoulders. Even though he was missing the spangly uniform, that was definitely Captain America standing in front of her with his brow deeply furrowed in concern. Darcy blinked slowly.

Nope, still there. Probably not a hallucination then.

“Right, injured, yes.” She turned and gestured to Jane still propped up miserably in the shade. “I think she might have a concussion. We got rammed off the road and-”

A low whistle interrupted her train of thought and another man strolled out from the driver’s side of Cap’s SUV, idly swinging the keys around one long, metal finger.  _Bucky Barnes_ , Darcy’s star-struck brain supplied. The bionic arm and the alarming number of weapons on his person were dead giveaways.

She hadn’t seen the former Winter Soldier in person before and was taken aback by the fact that he was much more _rakish_ than the gossip mill and some grainy, old photos led her to believe. His brown hair was long, almost artfully tousled, his stubble was closer to beard than not, and although he wore full tactical gear he was just disheveled enough- with his shirt collar pulled open and his vest half unzipped to reveal a tantalizing glimpse of dark chest hair- to remind Darcy of the covers of the trashy beach novels she brought.

It was hard to upstage Steve Rogers in the sexy department, but this guy was pulling it off. Big time.

“You two do all this?” he asked, arching a brow. Barnes walked over and kicked at the prone bodies of the Hydra agents with a heavy combat boot. The big one groaned, but didn’t move. “Decent work,” he finished with a grin.

“Uh, thanks?” Darcy couldn’t take her eyes of the corded muscle and sweat-glistened skin of his exposed neck and that damned patch of chest hair. Her fingers itched with the urge to follow the trail _south._

“Buck, get me the medkit from the back and radio in that we’re going to need prisoner transfer,” Captain America ordered, already making his way toward Jane. Barnes complied, sending Darcy another cheeky smirk before disappearing back into the SUV.

Darcy hovered anxiously over Steve’s shoulder as he crouched down in front of Jane to assess her injuries. He was remarkably gentle, his large hands careful and delicate as he checked her pulse, then her pupils, and tilted her head to get a better look the swelling.

He followed up by asking Jane some basic questions; what was her level of pain, did she feel dizzy or nauseated or confused, was she injured anywhere else - all run of the mill inquires for the potentially concussed. Jane bristled indignantly, resenting the child-like treatment, but submitted after a pointed glare from her assistant. It was such a typical _Jane Foster_ reaction to receiving help that Darcy had to laugh. It was a least comforting to know her stubbornness hadn’t been affected.

A sudden warm hand on her shoulder made Darcy jump. She spun around only to knock right into the solid wall of muscle and kevlar that was Bucky Barnes. Her breath caught in her throat, an embarrassing laspe she tried to play off with a wince as him jarring her new bruises.

“Careful there, sweetheart,” he chuckled, steadying her with his left hand while he handed off the medkit to Steve with his other. “Mind answering some questions for me?”

Bucky led her back to the scene of the action, upwind from the rental truck fire, and listened as Darcy attempted to explain exactly what had happened. With the adrenaline now depleted from her system, her memory (and general willingness to do things other than nap) was getting fuzzy.

“And you have no idea where they came from or if they were even targeting you and Dr. Foster?”

“Nope.”

“Uh huh - well,” he paused, finally seeming to notice the way she was cradling her left arm to her chest. He held his hand out as if waiting for her to take it. “This happen in the crash?”

Reluctantly, Darcy let him take her arm and use his rough hands to poke and prod at her tender wrist.  She bit her lip to keep from crying out when his metal fingers dug in too hard. “ _Ouch!_ And actually no, the big ugly one has a strong grip,” she muttered, yanking her wrist back.

Barnes’ eyes nearly bugged out of his head. “He got close enough to - _Jee-sus_. You do realize you could have been killed, right?” he demanded, scrubbing his hand over his face.

“Not like we had much of a choice. Plus our plan worked so - hey!” Darcy yelped, protesting weakly as Bucky seizer her by the shoulder and all but dragged her closer to the goons.

“See that weapon there,” he pointed to the long, matte black gun next to man she tased. “It’s capable of firing 500 high capacity rounds per minute. I’ve seen one cut through a jeep in under two. What do you have again, a bug zapper?”

“H-hey, my _bug zapper-”_ she sputtered indignantly, only to be cut off again.

“I thought you dolls were supposed to be smart.”

_“Excuse me?”_

Oh that was it, she’d had more than enough of _garbage_ for one day, thank you very much. Darcy spun angirly from his grip, ignoring the pain that flared from her injuries. All the frustration and fear and anger from the day boiled into pure, hot rage directed towards Barnes. For fuck’s sake, she wasn’t exactly expecting him to baby her, but this was bordering on _cruel._

“We raided their camp this morning; these assholes don’t mess around. Who do you think shot that guy? This isn’t some silly game, Lewis.” Bucky started to get riled up himself now, arms gesticulating wildly like he was conducting the world’s grumpiest symphony. “Next time, you won’t be so lucky and we’ll be getting a call to come claim your bodies. You girls should really check with people before you run off into trouble.”

_You girls?_

“Well maybe if you aim wasn’t shit, Jane and I wouldn’t have had any trouble in the first place!” Darcy yelled back, her furious brain zeroing in on ‘you girls’ and nearly imploding. Her hand was itching with the urge to slap his handsome, condescending face.

“There is nothing wrong with my aim,” he bit out, straightening his spine to tower over her. But Darcy wasn’t backing down.

“ _Riiight_ , and I bet the bad guys you let go free sure agree. The way I see it, you should thank us for doing your job for you. Not. Yelling. At. Me!” A slender, manicured finger poked into Bucky’s chest, punctuating each word.

He grabbed her wrist with a growl and pulled her bodily into him. There was an odd look on his face, beneath the anger, that made Darcy shiver despite the intense heat. “ _Don’t-”_

The not so subtle rumble of Captain America clearing his throat sharply cut off whatever scathing reply Bucky had begun and made the two verbal combatants jump apart like they’d been electrocuted. The larger man was looking on with a mixture of surprise and disappointment while holding a disgruntled, squirming astrophysicist in an awkward bridal carry. “I don’t know what the hell is going on with you two and I don’t _care_.”

“Steve, these _civilians_ were-”

“Stow it, Bucky. This isn’t the time or place.” Steve brushed past his partner and Darcy on his way to deposit Jane into the back seat of their SUV. Once he had her settled, he rounded on the pair again. They at least had the good sense to look guilty, though Bucky was still glowering.

“Ms. Lewis, I’d thought you’d like to know that Dr. Foster should be just fine.” Darcy nearly collapsed with relief. Steve let go of his irritation and gave the young woman a comforting pat on the back in solidarity. He knew what it was like to be overcome with worry over a friend. “And we’ll get you two out of here as soon as possible.”

“Thank you, “ Darcy replied emphatically before turning to climb into the car after Jane. She was more than happy to escape the tension that had formed with Barnes. And despite the assurance of Captain freaking America himself, she still didn’t like the thought of her friend being alone right then. She found Jane pouting insolently and clutching an instant ice-pack to her forehead, a mutinous look in her amber eyes. Darcy felt her heart swell with affection for the hard headed scientist.

“I’m _fiiiine_ , Darcy,” Jane insisted before Darcy could even open her mouth. “Not that _he’d_ listen…”

“Oh be nice. Two Avengers came to pick our sorry asses up from the middle of a swamp; the least you can do is humor their need to make sure we’re not dying.” Darcy relaxed into her seat, closing her eyes against the sudden exhaustion that swept over her. It was was still cool inside the car and the tinted windows kept out the harsh rays of the sun. Give her five minutes and she was sure she’d be snoring.

“Oh yeah, is that what you were doing with Barnes, _humoring_ him?” Jane accused, poking a bony finger into the side of her assistant. Darcy groaned.

“Shut it, Foster.”

* * *

You need to loosen up on the kid, Buck,” Steve chided, sliding the last of the Jane’s instruments into the trunk with the rest. It was a tight fit and unloading them all was going to be like high stress Jenga, but the only other option was to leave it all for SHEILD’s clean up team to pick up and Dr. Foster almost had a coronary at the mere suggestion.

“Oh come on, Steve.” Bucky pushed off from where he was resting against the bumper, sulking like an overgrown child and not even bothering to help. “Did Foster tell you what happened? You can’t tell me you think their little plan was _a good idea_.”

Steve pinched the bridge of his nose and slammed the trunk shut with enough force to accidentally shake the entire car. The women inside both swore loud enough for them to hear it outside. “Of course I don’t. It was risky and dangerously stupid, and exactly the same sort of thing either of us would have pulled in the same situation.”

Bucky just grumbled something probably insulting under his breath and made for the driver’s side. His fists were clenched so tight you could hear the car keys grinding together in his hand.

All the satisfaction Steve had felt earlier was gone, replaced with his own sour mood. “No irreversible damage was done,” he called out to his retreating back. “They’re safe now and will be fine with a little rest and some ice. So what the hell is your problem?”

“I miscounted.” He stopped, but didn’t turn around, like he was talking to himself. Steve had to strain to hear.

“What?”

“I fired ten shots, neutralized ten men. It was my job to make sure they were all accounted for before we cleared the scene. I failed. They got hurt. _She_ got hurt.”

His words hung in the air, clumped in the humid atmosphere like a cloud of guilt. Steve felt it like a punch to the gut. He cursed himself for not even realizing, for not saying something sooner.

“That’s not your fault, Buck. _I_ was in command, the blame falls on me not you.” He reached for Bucky’s shoulder, but the other man shrugged him off.

“Just get in the car, Steve.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah you guys are the best! I couldn't ask for better readers <3


	4. Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oops. This is way later than I intended. Sorry about that, and thank you all for your patience.

It couldn’t be denied that the natural landscape they were traveling through was beautiful; vast, open prairies with fields of colorful wildflowers interspersed with weathered oaks and pines and breezy palms. No condos or strip malls, no urban sprall - just the occasional roadside fruit stand or little farm dotted with fat cows. It was serene, calming even.

Or it would have been if Darcy could actually _see any of it_ as they whizzed by so fast it all blurred together like a living impressionist painting. .

Judging solely by his driving, she had to wonder if the arm wasn’t the only metal limb surgically grafted onto Bucky Barnes by Hydra. He was a hell of a lead foot, speeding down highways and back roads with an alarming disregard for traffic laws.

She’d be upset - her being of the mind that one car accident was more than enough drama for the day thank you very much - if his recklessness didn’t mean that they’d probably get to their destination faster and she could say ‘sayonara’ to this dude and his attitude.

Even if he was kind of nice to look at and made her stomach do a traitorous sort of swoop every time their eyes met in the rear-view mirror.

_Nope. Not going there. That is too much car for you, Darcy._

For good measure, Darcy shot a scowl to the back of Barnes’ headrest. For once his icy blues didn’t glare back at hers in the mirror. She glanced up through the windshield just in time to see a huge, greyish lump in the road ahead. The car jerked as Bucky swung around it, not even slowing down.

“Was that a-”

“Alligator, yes. And sit back in your seat, will ya? Jeesus, is your seatbelt even on?”

“Yes, _Dad,_ it’s on,” Darcy grumbled, tugging hard on the strap across her shoulder to prove it. The belt clicked and tightened, triggering the safety mechanism and pinning her flush to the seat. She huffed, unbuckled herself and fixed it, cursing grumpy, one armed supersoldiers with soft-looking hair under her breath and _definitely not blushing._

Beside her, Jane tore her eyes away from sullenly gazing out the window to shoot her assistant a warning look. In the front passenger seat, Steve let out a cough that sounded suspiciously like a stifled laugh.

“You know what, Lewis-”

“That alligator sure was weird, right?” Steve Rogers, with his seemingly preternatural sense of impending danger, cut off what was sure to be another winner from his best friend with a true gem of his own.

“Uh…”

There was a beat, a strange moment of silence that enveloped the car, like everyone was simultaneously questioning what their ears just heard. Of all the crazy things that happened since she woke up that morning, that had to be the most surreal. Darcy wouldn’t have even believed it had happened if Jane wasn’t looking at her wide-eyed, hand covering her mouth in a futile attempt to hold back her laughter.

“Pretty sure they’re a normal occurence down here, Captain,” Darcy ventured, holding back her own giggles. Jane couldn’t hang on any longer and lost it. They both dissolved into borderline hysterical laughter. Even Bucky was chuckling in the front seat.

Steve hunched down in his seat, making himself as small as his considerable bulk would allow. “Yes, I know - I just… I’ve never seen one. In the road. Before.”

“Sure, pal. Why don’t you just keep looking out the window. Maybe you’ll see a strange squirrel to add to your animal sightings.” Bucky reached out blindly and gave him a pat on the shoulder. Steve swatted his hand away.

“You know what, jerk, it was an honest observation!” He resolutely ignored the two women in the backseat who had begun to laugh harder.

“Oh, I don’t doubt that.”

“I see how it is. Should I bring up the time in France when you screamed and gave up our position to the Germans because you saw a _badger?”_

“Hey! Badgers are  _mean,_ Steve. I could have gotten rabies!”

“They don't even have rabies in France!”

“Oh my god, stop..  Please, no more. My ribs,” Jane groaned, clutching her side and wiping tears from her eyes.

Steve cleared his throat. His neck had turned a brilliant shade of red. “I’m sorry, Dr. Foster. Are you alright?”

“She’s fine. And don’t apologize, we really needed that. Turns out almost getting murdered by terrorists is kind of a bummer,” Darcy replied, smiling up at him.

“Really? I’ve always found it rather cathartic,” Bucky Barnes said with an honest to god wink. Darcy didn’t even mind that he took his eyes off the road going over 80 miles per hour, it was pretty sexy. And so refreshing after dealing with his grumpy old grandpa side for most of their encounter.

“That’s because you need therapy, Barnes. Like _all_ the therapy.”

He paused a moment and shrugged. “You’re not wrong.” 

All the tension in the car from earlier had all but disappeared at that point, thanks to Steve’s little flub. In fact, it had worked so well that Darcy had to wonder if it was _truly_ accidental. Sure, he’d gotten all bashful and red faced at first, but she could see his grin turn decidedly smug in the reflection in the windshield as he all but basked in the now comfortable atmosphere he’d created.

The more she thought about, the more impressed she got. It was brilliant, really. Captain America was every bit the genius strategist the history books declared him.

Darcy was totally putting him on her Christmas cookie list.

“Oh hey, Steve look! Another gator.”

Darcy snorted. Okay, so maybe Bucky was going on the list too. 

* * *

 

It took a lot longer than it should have for the whole “pointing random animals out to Steve and laughing at him” thing to get old than it should have. It wasn’t even that funny, not enough to provide actual adults with enough entertainment to last the whole hour drive back to the SHIELD safehouse. But it did nearly that, the novelty eventually wearing off and a calm, relaxed mood taking its place after the 50 mile mark.

After some fiddling with the dial, Steve managed to find a local radio station that didn’t play nothing but country or Jesus rock - an adult soft rock station in the middle of a James Taylor marathon - that added a sleepy sort of air to the car. Jane started to nod off somewhere between “Carolina on My Mind” and “Don’t Let Me Be Lonely Tonight”.

It was nice, way better than Darcy had dared to hope for while she was sweating her ass off, in pain and trying not to freak out, waiting for rescue on the side of the road. Hell, it was even starting to feel like a vacation again. Like maybe they left the worst behind them on that godforsaken stretch of dirt masquerading as a highway. Because, in reality, what could be worse than Hydra randomly crashing into you in the middle of nowhere and being stranded with two dangerous psychopaths in 90 degree weather with 90% humidity?

As soon as she thought it, she should have known that she’d jinxed herself. But she got complacent, felt too safe with two super soldiers acting as overpowered escorts.

Because of course, stupid fucking Florida had no concept of rhetorical questions and enthusiastically supplied her with an answer.

At first, none of them really noticed the dark clouds; the car’s tinted windows made everthing look vaguely gloomy to begin with. And even the first drops of rain were easy enough to write off as simple, summer shower.  
  
But a few drops quickly turned to a few hundred, then to a few thousand as the once blue sky suddenly shifted to an ominous black, casting a heavy veil over the horizon. Soon, Bucky had to turn on the headlights as he navigated into the brewing storm, thankfully also slowing down as the road turned slick in the rain.

“Where the hell did all this come from?” Steve sat up straighter in his seat, twisting around to look at the expanse of clear sky still visible behind them.

“We are pretty close to the tropics. Sudden storms aren’t uncommon down here, what with all the low pressure fronts coming off the Atlantic,” Jane said, losing the fight against a giant yawn. Her eyes were still closed, face resting against the shoulder strap of her seatbelt.

“Fucking Florida,” Darcy translated. Low level anxiety was starting to thrum under her skin, making her feel itchy and vaguely car sick. She wasn’t _afraid_ of storms per se, but she sure as hell wasn’t looking forward to riding one out in a car. She’d seen Twister. Reinforced SHIELD SUV or not, a strong enough wind could still toss the damn thing like a freaking salad. “We almost to this base of yours, fellas?”

“Sit tight, Lewis. We’re about 5 miles out.”

“Thank god,” she muttered under her breath.

A sudden crack of thunder, loud enough to vibrate the car, made everyone jump - even Jane who then immediately perked up to peer hopefully out the window, only to be disappointed when the noise was followed by more rain and not a beefy, blonde Asgardian returning to Earth to rock her world. Darcy would have laughed if she wasn’t stressing out.

“Jesus, this weather. Steve, can you check the radar and see if this is letting up anytime soon? Extraction is gonna next to impossible in this visibility."

Darcy glanced up at his words and immediately regretted it. Bucky was sitting ramrod straight in his seat, hands at ten and two like a nervous driver’s ed student, as he squinted through the windshield. The road ahead was nearly impossible to see through the barrage of wind and rain. Her stomach flipped and she squeezed her eyes shut.

“No kidding. Give me a minute,” Steve replied, poking the touchscreen on the center console and swiping his fingers a few times until a doppler map of the region came up. The women in the backseat both leaned in to get a better look at the monitor.

Whatever she saw there made Jane tense and grab onto Darcy’s hand. “Uh oh.”

“What? What’s ‘uh oh’? Don’t just say ‘uh oh’ and not elaborate, Jane! That is not okay,” she ranted, clinging to her friend’s hand like a lifeline. There was a hysterical tinge to her voice that made her wince.

Another clap of thunder rumbled outside. Bucky swore as lightning lit up the field to their left.

“Okay, don’t freak out, but-” Jane paused, clearly searching for the best way to gently break the news.  
  
“Why is there always a ‘but’?” Somewhere between the storm and the look on her friend’s face, Darcy became unable to control both the words that came out of her own mouth and the volume of her voice.  
  
“What is it, Dr. Foster? ‘Cause I gotta be honest, I have no clue what I’m looking at here.” Steve’s golden brow was furrowed with worry when he turned in his seat to speak directly to Jane.  
  
Jane sighed. “If this radar is accurate, then this storm isn’t going anywhere for awhile. It’s a hurricane.”

...

“I think I’m going to throw up.”

* * *

“How?”

“ _We don’t know yet, Steve. Our contact with NOAA says they’ve never seen anything like it. The cell developed in less than three hours._ ” The Black Widow’s voice was less than reassuring as it flowed from the SUV’s built in comms unit.  
  
Bucky had pulled over so he and Steve could figure out what the hell they were going to do. Hydra, alien invasions, evil robots - give them something tangible they could fight and they were confident they could handle it, but this… even super soldiers couldn’t punch hurricanes.  
  
“Do know how fast it’s moving? Wind speed, pressure levels, eye diameter, anything that would give us an idea of how long we have until the worst hits?” Luckily, they had Jane and her giant brain to pick up their slack.  
  
_“I’m sending all the data I have to the onboard computer. I think you’ll be able make better sense of it than me, Dr. Foster._ ”  
  
There was a ‘ping’ and folder popped up on the screen. Jane unbuckled her seatbelt and wedged herself between the front seats in order to get a better look. Darcy reluctantly let go of her hand, opting instead to sit back and try to square her breathing.

Hurricanes were a whole nother ball game. She took back every bad thing she’d ever said or even _thought_ against the Florida. Clearly, she had angered the state and it was now enacting its revenge. 

While Jane worked, Steve assumed full Captain America mode. “Natasha, how bad is this?”  
  
“ _Well it’s no Galactus level event, but it’s not going to be a picnic either. SHIELD has already alerted the governor and the National Guard, but a storm this big, this sudden-_ ”  
  
“People aren’t going to be able to get out in time.”  
  
The silence from the other end made the temperature in the car seemingly plummet. Millions of people potentially caught unaware in the path of a major storm. It was going to be catastrophic.  
  
“We have to be able to do something to help.”  
  
_“I don’t think you can, Steve. There’s a quinjet in route to pick the four of you up as we speak.”_  
  
“No.”  
  
_“Cap, you can’t fight the weather-_ ”  
  
“No, but I’m not taking resources better spent on saving lives. Reroute the jet - reroute all the jets. Tell Hill to make civilian evac the top priority, starting with the coastal communities in path of the storm. Barnes and I will take Lewis and Foster back to base and ride out the storm there.” Steve’s tone left no room for argument.

It gave Darcy chills, experiencing first hand one of the reasons Steve Rogers was a living legend. For a moment, she was so filled with _purpose_ and concern for her fellow man that she forgot about her fear.

That is until another huge rumble of thunder and flash lightning brought her back to the edge of panic. 

 _“Roger that, Cap. Good luck out there.”_ Natasha signed off and the car went quiet.

“Welll,” Bucky clapped his hands together. It sounded odd, like someone high-fiving a length of lead pipe. “Never been in a hurricane before. Might be fun”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hmm... I wonder where the storm came from?
> 
> I can't thank you guys enough for all the comments and kudos and support! I adore each and every one of you <3<3<3


	5. Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Posting went all wonky yesterday, and this story never appeared in the tags :( 
> 
> So here is a small baby chapter in hopes that things work now...? Fingers crossed!

“SHIELD is so extra,” Darcy observed as Bucky pulled the car into an underground garage that had opened up out of a grassy hill, like a gaping, toothless mouth. 

The safe house was set up atop the little hill, a quaint farmhouse inspired building with a wraparound porch and an overwhelmingly rustic feel. Not at all what Darcy had imagined when she picture a SHIELD base. The damn thing had a rooster weather vane for crying out loud (though, she’d stake money on it being weaponized).

Once the garage door sealed shut behind them, it was like being inside a vacuum. One second they could barely hear each other over the howling wind and rolling thunder, the next - silence. The sterile concrete walls had to be at least 3 feet thick. Probably built to withstand a nuclear bomb or something equally alarming that made a hurricane seem cute in comparison.

“You should see the roof,” Bucky replied as he parked the car in a spot in between a motorcycle and what looked like an armored jet-ski. “It folds out into a fully functional airstrip.”

Darcy whistled. “Jane, you gotta petition for a raise or something. They clearly have too much money.”

“Uh huh, sure Darce. Hey, does this place have a lab? I’m going to need a place to set up my equipment,” Jane started, already hopping out of the car and heading for the trunk, clearly craving to get back to work like an addict jonesing for another hit. “I also need a workstation with a secure internet connection, several extension cords, a window with a clear view of the sky and maybe some snacks? Pop-tarts if you have them, but anything with a lot of sugar will do.”

Jane shut the door behind her, leaving Darcy alone with a bemused pair of super soldiers. She reached out with her good arm and gave Bucky and Steve each a pat on the shoulder before moving to follow her distracted boss.

“Welcome to my world, gentlemen! Mind popping the trunk? She doesn’t respond well to her equipment being in the back of shady government vehicles.”

Wordlessly, Bucky pushed a button on the dash and the trunk automatically swung open.

“‘Preciate it!” Darcy shot him a thumbs up and ducked out, calling out to Jane as she disappeared around the back.

“Huh.” Bucky frowned and turned to Steve who was silently shaking his head, a small smile tugging at his lips.  “The hell is a ‘Pop-tart”?”

“Not a clue, pal.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not even sure this will work, but hey! either way, extra little chapter?
> 
> If you're subscribed to this story, can you confirm or deny that you received a notification email for this? I would be most grateful. 
> 
> All the love! <3


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